How To Handle Your Husband’s Mistress


I read a report yesterday about a lady who poured hot water on her husband’s mistress and I was shocked that it has to get to this. Reading through the comments I also saw a woman who left a comment that she has also been tempted to do same.


Each day most married women are torn apart emotionally by the unfaithfulness of their spouse. They are faced with what is right and wrong in regards to how to confront their husband’s mistress.


Some who have decided to over look it are sometimes dared by the so-called mistress, who sometimes confront or taunt them. Is it right to let your guard down and go all out for this shameless mistress/mistresses?


Infidelity is an epidemic that is bent on destroying marriage. The marriage institution has been fighting this battle with infidelity for as long as I can remember and it seems to get worse by the day.

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As you prepare to get married have it at the back of your mind that infidelity will surface at a point in your marriage and get ready beforehand on how to deal with it.

Like the woman I mentioned earlier, pouring hot water on your husband mistress does not resolve the issue instead it complicates it. First if anything happens to the mistress as a result of your action you will face the law. At the end of the day you will suffer both emotional and physical pain.

It is unarguable that infidelity hurts deep down to the bone marrow, it leaves one sad and devastated. You feel betrayed and sometimes worthless. It even hurts more when you know who your partner is cheating on you with. You may feel tempted to confront that person, teach her a lesson of her life but wait a second!

Are you really addressing the issue or just complicating it? I bet that all you want is to address the issue, have your husband to yourself and make him want just you. Do you think attacking the mistress will make you achieve this? Even if you are successful in chasing this one away will that stop him from moving to the next available lady? So how many more battles do you want to fight?

If for instance a snake and a rat comes into your house which would you chase first? The answer is obvious. If you keep on attacking your husband’s mistress it as good as chasing the rat first instead of the snake. Can you see it is senseless?

The culprit here is your husband and not the mistress, instead of going after your husband’s mistress, discuss about your husband’s infidelity with him and how it affects you. If he is not willing to change and turn a new leaf then you might seek legal help.

Don’t descend so low as to get into a fight or exchange of words with your husband’s mistress. It’s not going to change anything. The mistress knows you exist before dating your husband and most times have all your information. so attacking her won’t make her leave your husband instead sometimes it makes her more resolved to take him completely away from you.

If your husband’s mistress chats you up or call you to inform you about her relationship with your husband, be calm and composed, I know this will be very difficult but it is the best thing to do. talk to her politely and use wisdom to indirectly make her look foolish. Her purpose of calling is to taunt you and make you extremely angry and cause trouble between you and your husband. The best way not to let your guard down and fall into her trap is not to act as she would have expected.

After the chat or call you can pour out all your emotions but not before her. Remember like I said earlier on, your husband is to blame for this, it is him that has trampled on your worth, it is him that has given another woman the right to confront and taunt you. It is him that has decided to share what rightfully belongs to you with others, so don’t take it out on the mistress.

I am not exonerating the mistress, she also has a fault in this as it takes two to tangle. Of course she shouldn’t be dating a married man but if your darling husband has zipped up and learnt to be satisfied and contented with just you, you won’t have to deal with this. Don’t worry, there is what is called nemesis,so she would surely pay for it someday when she gets married.

In conclusion,control your emotions as hurtful as you may feel don’t attack or confront your husband’s mistress, especially when you are angry is not the best time to act! Don’t complicate issue by attacking your husband’s mistress as you might get into trouble because of your action ( imagine if the mistress dies in the process of you hitting her or pouring hot water on her)and then face the wrath of the law while your husband continues gallivanting all around. Is that what you want for yourself?

Be more civilized about it. Remember your husband is the culprit here and so he is the one you have an issue with. So address the issue with him and leave out the mistress/mistresses. What’s the use of fighting a battle for someone whose heart is with someone else.

Marriage isn’t a do or die affair, even the creator has rules on how to handle an unfaithful partner if you can’t condone it. If you can’t deal with an unfaithful partner then quit and have peace of mind.

Above all, couples should learn to take their vows seriously. When you cheat on your spouse you not only hurt your spouse but you also hurt the creator as the creator has said “ Let marriage be honorable among all,and the marriage bed be without defilement”


7 Replies to “How To Handle Your Husband’s Mistress

  1. Wow! What a great post. Thanks so much for this.i was just searching on how to deal with this issue and I found this. My husband’s girlfriend is not giving me a breathing space. I am just tired of the whole situation. Now I know exactly what to do.

  2. This days all this young ladies target the married men and unfortunately our men don’t even bait any eyelid before falling into their trap. Sometimes I wonder why men get married in the first place if they still intend to have mistress and give their wife heartache.

  3. I am so sad, confused and angry as I just discovered my husband who has been claiming he’s broke has just rented an apartment for his mistress and furnished it. I don’t know what to do, I am heartbroken.

  4. The first time I found out my husband was cheating on me and has a mistress, I fainted. I trusted him So much but he betrayed my trust. It’s just bad that women find themselves in this dilemma, am still hurting but it’s difficult to quit, have accepted it as my cross.

  5. It’s not that easy to ignore them, sometimes they need to be taught a lesson before they leave your husband.

Disclaimer: Opinions expressed in comments are those of the comment writers alone and does not reflect or represent the views of MyRegistryWedding.

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