Cheating is a very painful experience for the spouse that have been cheated on. Cheating on your wife can affect her mental health. It can make her depressed and traumatized. Infact it can rob her of her joy and happiness and change her outlook to life completely.
Hence, do not expect her to accept you plea and welcome you back into her life with a hug and kiss. You have broken her trust which is like stabbing her with a sharp knife. The pain she feels at the moment is expected and can take months or years to heal if not handled properly so do not expect her to forgive you easily and move on.
You must make no excuse for your infidelity as there is no acceptable reason to cheat on your wife. Trying to make an excuse is a sure way of telling her you’ll still do it again and that you are not remorseful for your action. You need to realize that it is 100% your fault for cheating and this will reflect in your attitude.
Don’t also try to act as the victim by bringing up issues that have happened in the past and using it as a reason for your unfaithfulness. Remember, your wife is never the reason why you cheated, you alone is responsible for the decision to betray her trust and cheat on her.
How To Make Her Forgive You
Getting your wife to forgive you it’s not going to be an easy task, so do not expect her forgiveness quickly or for your relationship to return to how it used to be. Remember, she is going through emotional trauma and pain and she is trying to deal with your betrayal so don’t give her attitude or get fed up easily if she is paying no attention to your plea.
Instead continue to ask for her forgiveness for as long as it’s going to take. If she doesn’t want to talk to you or she has moved out of the house keep sending her sincere and genuine messages begging her through email and sms. If you are truly remorseful and truly love her you would not get fed up begging her till she accept.
If she is still living with you, apart from begging her through messages you can also show her you are a changed person through your attitude. She might be angry but she is surely paying attention to your way of life. Do you still keep late nights? Do you still stay out of the home on weekends? Do you still password your phone?
If you must make her forgive you, then the trust that has been broken needs to be rebuilt and this you can do by living a transparent life. Tell her in the messages you send her the steps you are taking to avoid a repeat of such. Share your email ,social media and phone passwords with her. Infact you can suggest both of you to be using the same phone, synchronizing your phone, using the same email and so forth.
Building that trust back will not be easy but it is worth it if you truly love her and value your relationship. So don’t give up when it seems she isn’t giving in to all your efforts. Remember, it is a bad place to be for any woman and you must help her to heal through your actions.
Most importantly, do not start involving third parties to plead with her especially if she is someone who loves her privacy. Don’t go about telling every tom and harry about your issues as some may even downplay the situation and advice you wrongly which can be detrimental to your relationship.
You are the one that have offended her so it is you and no one else that should seek for her forgiveness and show her you truly value her and want her back in your life. Stop sending unnecessary emissaries to her as you are only making your private issue a public matter which doesn’t show you are matured.
If you continually beg her, show through your actions that you are truly remorseful and that you are a changed person., communicate with her steps you have taken to avoid a repeat of such in the future, live a transparent life by hiding nothing from her by sharing your email, social media and phone password with her or better still use the same phone with her, she would forgive you. You can also ask her exactly what you can do to get her trust back.
Remember, this isn’t going to happen automatically, it can take several months or even years but your sincerity and willingness to win her back will make you not to give up. You must also have it at the back of your mind that winning her back and being forgiven by her is as important as NEVER cheating on her again.
If you know you’ll still cheat on her again please save her the trauma and let her go! Cheating it’s a very destructive tool that can be used to destroy the life of your wife. Hence, just end the marriage and free her if you know you’ll still cheat on her again.