One of the issue couples face in marriage is inlaw conflict. Care has to be taken in this regard to ensure you and your spouse does not step on the toes of your parents. The onus lies on you and your spouse to know how to manage your parents, from the onset of your marriage let your parents know their limitations in your marriage so that they do not see your spouse as a stumbling block .
You must see your inlaws as your parents otherwise you will keep on finding fault with them, be quick to forgive their wrong doings and learn to tolerate their excesses. If you do not want your in-laws to live with you,you and your spouse should have a mutual understanding regarding this from the onset of your marriage. It is wrong for you to want to accommodate your family members but become very intolerance with your in-laws.
The biggest mistake you can make is to see your mother inlaw as your enemy even when she is overbearing. Try and get closer to your mother inlaw and when she tries to make decisions for you and your spouse and you are so uncomfortable with that never confront her,rather get your spouse to talk to your mother inlaw and let her know her limitations in your family. Never fight your mother inlaw,never make her feel unwelcome in your home instead try your best to understand her and make her your friend. Do most of those things you know she likes, also take good care of her by buying her things and ensuring she is happy.
Treat your mother inlaw the way you will treat your mother, if possible even better than the way you will treat your mother. No matter how troublesome your mother inlaw may be never give her a tooth for a tooth instead tolerate her and be good to her with time she will come around.