Marriage is such a wonderful Institution where you have the good , the bad and the ugly . Today there is a lot going on in this institution called marriage, while some are getting out , some are desperately seeking to get in. Marriage is a precious gift from our creator and there are many factors that determines how your experience in your marriage will be . Do you remember the saying ” how you lay your bed that is how you lie on it” this also applies to your marriage. Your marriage is what you make of it.
There was a form of physical attraction between you and your partner before you both agreed to tie the knot, if you look back and compare that time to now, does that attraction still exist? For some the more they advance in their marriage their attraction for each other intensifies while for others the more years they spend together the attraction decreases, which of these applies to you? In most case I have noticed that the later prevails, after so many years of marriage some couples have complained that they are no longer attracted to their spouse, do you know why ? Because In most cases their spouse have let go of them self after marriage.
You need to know that love is different from attraction in marriage, you can love your spouse but may not be attracted to your spouse due to the physical appearance of your spouse, which perhaps can be weight gain , looking shabby and unkept and so forth( this are not physical changes that are inevitable) Your physical senses are triggered to be attracted or passionate about a person on sighting a person’s physical appearance. Physical attraction is very important in marriage as it helps sustain intimacy in marriage.
Even though it may not be easy to look exactly the same way you looked before getting married but realizing the importance of physical attraction between you and your spouse will make you not to let go off yourself after marriage. Are you the type of person that feels you don’t need to look attractive again after marriage based on the assumption that what else are you looking for , my dear you are very wrong. dress well when you are at home , don’t look unkept and shabby, look neat. If you are a woman, get your hair done on a regular bases , apply makeup if your spouse loves it, dress young, know the kind of outfit your husband likes and put them on , don’t behave as if you have reached your last bus stop. Your husband is watching you unknowingly to you. He either gets attracted to you or he decides to put up with your shabby looks.
Same goes for the man, some men too are dirty. I have heard of a lady complain bitterly of how dirty her husband is, even though it is part of the woman ‘s job as a helper to make sure her husband is clean but you the man has a major role to play here because you are an adult and know what is right or wrong. If you want to remain attractive to your wife then look neat, cut your hair when it is necessary , have a trimmed beard, smell fresh and look good for your spouse .
You and your spouse also needs to keep fit, excessive weight gain can repel your spouse and lessen the attraction between both of you. Hence you need to watch your weight, if you have a protruding belly as a man, work on this same goes for you the woman. Sometimes your spouse may not even be aware that you are being repelled by his or her physical appearance as a result of his or shabby looks or weight gain , this is not the time to rant, rave, nag or blame your spouse, instead have a heart to heart discussion with your spouse explaining to your spouse how you feel about his or her looks or weight gain, explain to your spouse exactly how this affects you and how you think this can be resolved. Don’t ever resort to teasing or shaming your spouse about their physical appearance, honestly you will achieve nothing by doing this.Be very careful in your choice of words when discussing this matter.
You must try your best to remain attractive to your spouse in marriage, don’t let go of yourself feeling there is no one looking at you, the most important person in your life-your spouse is looking at you and if you want to continuously sustain the intimacy between you both and remain attractive to him or her then take good care of your self, look smart, dress well, be neat and attractive always.